star trek humor

[flare]

...ovo sam nasla na jednom drugom forumu i bilo mi je fora...pa evo....

if borg queen were...

20. Sisko: "We are the Borg. and the Bajoran Emmissary and..."

19. Tuvok: "We are the Borg. Assimilation is logical."

18. Seska: "We are the Borg... hello, Chakotay"

17. Seven: "We are the Borg. Again?!?"

16. Kira: "We are the Borg. You will be assimilated in the name of the Prophets."

15. Data: "We are the Borg. Borg: An intergellactive collective made up of, sentient biological and inorganic life forms working as a collective, first colonized in the year...blah blah blah..."

14. Scotty: "We are the Borg. You will be assimilated in one hour. But since you don't have an hour we'll do it in half an hour."

13. Q: "We are the Borg. Mere mortals are not worthy of assmililation. The Continum will simply erase you from time!"

12. T'pol: "We are the Borg. The Vulcan Science Directorate has determined that you will be assimilated. Resistance would be illogical."

11. Kirk: "We are the Borg. Give us your females!"

10. Janeway: "We are the Borg and don't call us 'Sir.'"

9. Quark: "We are the Borg. Give us money."

8. Paris: "We are the Borg. Resistance is futile, so how about a nice stroll on the holodeck and an Ij'okian Rum Punch?

7. Uhura: "We are the Borg. Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated and then you can wear that ridiculous mini-skirt that forces you to keep your legs crossed all the time. AHAHAHAHAHA"

6. Spock: "We are the Borg. Assimilation is logical. Resistance is most fascinating."

5. Garak: "We are the Borg. Resistance is futile, and so is thinking you can get away with wearing those shoes with that purse."

4. Troi: "It appears we are the Borg. I am sensing a strong futility in your resistance."

3. McCoy: "We are the...Damnit, Jim! I'm a doctor, not a Borg!

2. Neelix: "We are the Borg. We will add your technological and biological distinctiveness to our own. Won't that be nice?"

1. Picard: "We are the Borg. Resistance is futile...Number One."



Borg Humor
Borg Humor- That's something what you can't see very often.

Borg Advertising Slogans:
-Borgs are made, not Bjorn.
-McBorg - Over 500 billion assimilated
-Borger King - Our way. Your way is irrelevant
-The Borg Cable Co. : The Subscriber's wishes are irrelevant.
-Still assimilating ........... Nothing outlasts the Borg


If The Borg Assimilated Musicians...
-Victor Borg-a
-Borg in the USA
-Borg Dylan
-Borgara Streisand
-Borg to be Wild
-It's My Borg and I'll Cry If I Want To
-Paul Simon and the Borg at the Right Time Tour


Borg Taglines
-I am Al of Borg. Aww, Peg, I assimilated you last year.
-I am Bart of Borg - who the hell are you?
-I am Bugs Bunny of Borg. What's up, Collective?
-I am Caffeine of Borg. Sleep is irrelevant.
-I am Clinton of Borg. Hillary says resistance is futile!
-I am CopyCat of Borg. Your tagline will be assimilated.
-I am Dangerfield of Borg. Respect is irrelevant.
-I am Descartes of Borg: I assimilate therefore I am.
-I am Drunk of Borg. Resistance is floor tile.
-I am Flatulus of Borg. Prepare to pull my finger.
-I am Fudd of Borg! Pwepawe to be assimiwated!
-I am Fudd of Borg. Wesistance is usewess!
-I am Garfield of Borg - Hairballs are irrelevant.
-I am Ginsu of Borg. You will be assimilated - but WAIT! There's- MORE!
-I am Homer of Borg. Prepare to be... ooooohh, doughnuts!
-I am Jordan of Borg. Gravity is irrelevant.
-I am Madonna of Borg. Gender is irrelevant.
-I am Madonna of Borg: Justify my assimilation!
-I am OS/2 of Borg. DOS will be assimilated.
-I am Popeye of Borg. Prepare to be askimilgrated.
-I am Shakespeare of Borg. Prepare to be, or not to be, assimilated.
-I am Tweety of Borg. I _tawt_ I attimiwated a puddy tat!
-I am Yoda of Borg: Irrelevant the Force is.
-I am Zsa Zsa of Borg. Prepare to be assimilated dahling

[Renesis]

Dobri :clap:

[horza]

I am Homer of Borg. Prepare to be... ooooohh, doughnuts!

dobra

[Sam Fischer]

: roller :

Bravo...:clap:

[Fleks]

:clap: SUPER :clap:

[Bl@de]

Star Trek TNG Meets Microsoft

Picard:
Mr. LaForge, have you had any success with your attempts at
finding a weakness in the Borg? And Mr. Data, have you been able
to access their command pathways?

Geordi:
Yes, Captain. In fact, we found the answer be searching through
our archives on late twentieth-century computing technology.

Geordi presses a key, and a logo appears on the computer screen.

Riker [puzzled]:
What the hell is Microsoft?

Data [turns to explain]:
Allow me to explain. We will send this program, for some reason
called Windows, through the Borg command pathways. Once
inside their root command unit, it will begin consuming resources
at an unstoppable rate.

Picard:
But the Borg have the ability to adapt. Won't they alter their
processing systems to increase their storage capacity?

Data:
Yes, Captain. But when Windows detects this, it creates
a new version of itself known as an upgrade. The use of resources
increases exponentially with each iteration. The Borg will not
be able to adapt quickly enough. Eventually all of their processing
ability will be taken over and none will be available for their
normal operational functions.

Picard:
Excellent work. This is even better than that unsolvable
geometric shape idea.

...15 Minutes later...

Data:
Captain, we have successfully installed the Windows in the
Borg's command unit. As expected, it immediately consumed 85% of all
available resources. However, we have not received any confirmation
of the expected upgrade.

Geordi:
Our scanners have picked up an increase in Borg storage and CPU
capacity, but we still have no indication of an upgrade to
compensate for their increase.

Picard:
Data, scan the history banks again and determine if there is
something we have missed.

Data:
Sir, I believe there is a reason for the failure in the upgrade.
Apparently, the Borg have circumvented that part of the plan by
not sending in their registration cards.

Riker:
Captain, we have no choice. Requesting permission to begin
emergency escape sequence 3F!

Geordi [excited]:
Wait, Captain! Their CPU capacity has suddenly dropped to 0%!

Picard:
Data, what do your scanners show?

Data [studying displays]:
Apparently the Borg have found the internal Windows module
named Solitaire, and it has used up all available CPU capacity.

Picard:
Let's wait and see how long this Solitaire can reduce their
functionality.

...Two Hours Pass...

Riker:
Geordi, what is the status of the Borg?

Geordi:
As expected, the Borg have attempted to reengineer to compensate
for increased CPU and storage demands, but each time they
successfully increase resources I have set up our closest deep
space monitor beacon to transmit more Windows modules from
something called the Microsoft Fun Pack.

Picard:
How much time will that buy us?

Data:
Current Borg solution rates allow me to predict an interest
time span of 6 more hours.

Geordi:
Captain, another vessel has entered our sector.

Picard:
Identify.

Data:
It appears to have markings very similar to the Microsoft logo

[over the speakers]:
This is Admiral Bill Gates of the Microsoft flagship Monopoly.
We have positive confirmation of unregistered software in this sector.
Surrender all assets and we can avoid any trouble. You have 10
seconds to comply.

Data:
The alien ship has just opened its forward hatches and released
thousands of humanoid-shaped objects.

Picard:
Magnify forward viewer on the alien craft!

Riker:
My God, Captain! Those are human beings floating straight toward
the Borg ship - with no life support suits! How can they survive
the tortures of deep space?!

Data:
I do not believe that those are humans, sir. If you will look closer
I believe you will see that they are carrying something recognized by
twenty-first century man as doeskin leather briefcases, and wearing
Armani suits.

Riker and Picard together [horrified]:
Lawyers!

Geordi:
It can't be. All the Lawyers were rounded up and sent hurtling into
the sun in 2017 during the Great Awakening.

Data:
True, but apparently some must have survived.

Riker:
They have surrounded the Borg ship and are covering it will all types
of papers.

Data:
I believe that is known in ancient vernacular as red tape. It
often proves fatal.

Riker:
They're tearing the Borg to pieces!

Picard:
Turn the monitors off, Data, I can't bear to watch. Even the Borg
don't deserve such a gruesome death!

[Konan]

Ovo mi je jedna od najlegendarnijih fora na temu Treka. Isplatilo se kupiti zadnji PCPlay.

[J@nos_Herc]

Originally posted by Konan
Ovo mi je jedna od najlegendarnijih fora na temu Treka. Isplatilo se kupiti zadnji PCPlay.

LOL

[DrTom]

Sorry, ali ja ne kužim koja je fora vezana uz onu sliku :confused:

[ćiber_manija]

I ja također

[Konan]

Ma to je screenshoot iz kratkog filmica. Ako neko ima izraženu želju da ga vidi i 10 ak MB slobodnog inboxa pošaljem mu na mail. Prokleti modem i 33kb upload, ali ak je u vezi treka nije tesko.

[Emissary]

flare ROOOOOOOOOOOFL:clap: :clap: : roller : : roller : : roller : :burn:

[flare]

tnx...

...je, meni je isto bilo loooooooool kad sam procitala...

[Konan]

"Six of Ten, this is not your assignment."
-- Seven

"Please. Stop calling me that."
-- Harry Kim

"You are compromising our productivity. I am reassigning you to chamber maintenance. Your new designation is Two of Ten."
-- Seven


Epizoda Omega Particle.


I intervju sa kapetanicom:
http://www.time.com/time/archive/pre...999896,00.html